De Ja Vu

I don't even know how much time has passed since my last post and im not gonna check coz thats not gonna make a difference anyway . Yeah, you can tell from my tone that i'm pissed . Well , not that pissed but in a really bad mood . I'm done with my 11th grade . Can you imagine that? I'm finally a twelveth grader ! I barely made it through though . What happened to me ? I mean, i used to a top scorer and all . Maybe it was coz i was too naive then ? Nah . My low grades have been bringing me very bad consequences . I don't even have my speakers anymore . But thats not what i want to write about today . Before that , i'll just finish summing up . My one month vacation has started and it's no fun . Actually , i suppose it's been exactly about 1 year since i started this blog . Yay ! Confetti ! So , coming to the main topic . It's happened again . How do i manage to loose friends again ? Yeah , just like my best friend last year or my best friend before that or like all my best friends who are strangers now , i've made another best friend into a stranger . This really makes me cry now . I absolutely hate it . Last year , i might have grown a tiny crush for that particular friend so thereby screwed up the friendship , but the loss of that friendship hurt me terribly . Took me a long time to move on . And what helped that was the gain of new friends . Yeah , still have all those friends , though the people who got the closest to me were repelled away . But then , they'r only away physically , emotionally they'r still my best friends . But this one particular friend that i grew the most close to managed to break loose . I really liked her and really do miss the days where we'd talk freely . The stranger like behavior just pains me so so so much . I mean , ive got some kinda curse . Another friendship lost . But im kinda getting used to that now . I'll live . Till next time . Ciao